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Ordinary People Taking Action
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What would it mean to help illuminate the underlying thinking patterns that drive behavior and thereby gain access to new choices and possibilities? We all have a trajectory of development that is defined by stages. Stages 1 and 2 happen in our childhood and teenage years, and 75% of adults never go beyond stage 3.
We are shaped by the definitions and expectations of our personal environment – drawn to seeking alignment between our “self” and our surroundings. Because of this, in stage 3, we tend to surround ourselves by “like-minded” individuals. We identify and externally validate ourselves by our work, relationships, achievements, and possessions. While this is not necessarily a bad stage to stay in, it can become limiting. For example, we might feel inadequate or start to settle. There are a bunch of psychologists who dig a lot deeper into this than I just did, if you’re interested.
It’s recently become clear to me that it is important for adults to try to move from stage 3 to stage 4. In stage 4, we can step back enough from the social environment to generate an internal “seat of judgment”. This is like a personal authority that evaluates and makes choices about external expectations. Our “seat of judgment” enables us to take perspective on the surroundings. Here, we begin to differentiate our “self” from our own personal belief system. When this happens, we’re able to self-direct, take a stand, set limits and create personal boundaries based on our own needs. I think my friend, Joshua Miller, author of the book I Call Bullshit: Live Your Life, Not Someone Else’s, would say this is the stage where we clear the bullshit.
A very small percentage of adults advance to stage 5, which is truly self-transforming. We can take a step back from and reflect on the limits of our own personal authority, see that any one system is in some way partial or incomplete, and be friendlier towards contradiction and opposites. We start to look for wholeness and completeness; we seek to make an impact greater than just ourselves.
What if I told you I have a program that can take these stages out of theoretical speak and land them in a meaningful conversation about the patterns of our thinking that cause us to be stuck? What if there was a way for you or your organization to be guided through the journey from being stuck to creating your personal vision? What if you could forge a pathway to reach your fullest potential?
You probably are thinking, “yeah, yeah, whatever”. That this is just another gimmick to get you to buy services and attend another “training program”. Yet, that is not at all my intention. In fact, I hate gimmicks and I don’t believe there is any “easy” way to advance your consciousness and work through the stages of development. The work is hard. The struggle is real. And, at the end of the day, some people are perfectly fine being “stuck”. For when we are stuck, there is a level of comfort that comes with that. Certainty feels good and consequently, the status quo can seem perfectly acceptable.
When we are stuck, we are often approaching life from a place of reaction. That’s because the situation is causing us anxiety and containing us. This causes us to feel like “it” has me, “it” is managing me. In an anxious situation we tend to move away from things we don’t want and play not to lose. Our focus is on the outside environment controlling our internal operating system. In this space we operate from a place of reaction based on (perceived) fear or threats.
The other place we can operate from, which is often a development opportunity, is to move away from reaction and towards a creative mindset. This is the shift from stage 3 to stage 4, where we flip our thinking to focusing on outcomes and creating what we want. Typically, there is more positive energy associated with this space, as we step back and approach the situation from a place of I have “it”, I am managing “it”.
At stage 4, we move towards what matters most and playing together to win (an abundance mindset vs scarcity mindset). Our internal operation system is controlling our outward energy. From this place we move towards our purpose vision, passion and drive action. When you operate from this place, you truly have the potential to create anything – opportunities, relationships, processes, or possibilities.
If you want to learn how to advance to a new, higher potential for yourself – and want human touch and high impact support – contact us today. We are here to help you own your tomorrow – proactively.