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Ordinary People Taking Action
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When it's time to leave.2/28/2018 He came downstairs teary-eyed after a restless night of sleep. “I can’t do this anymore,” he said to his wife. She looked back at him with a blank expression as her mind raced to decipher the meaning behind his words. What exactly did he mean by “this”?
It had been two years of feeling like they were strangers, passing each other in the house on opposite schedules. The kids pulled them in different directions daily. Their jobs were demanding, causing them both to work endless hours. They often felt like there weren’t enough hours in the day or even in the week.
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Learner then Teacher2/27/2018 “Human knowledge is not like data stored in a computer’s memory bank. A computer doesn’t get better at remembering things the more data that is stored on it. Human knowledge, on the other hand, is hungry and alive. People with knowledge about a topic become faster and better at acquiring more knowledge and remembering what they learn.”
This is a quote from The Social Animal, by David Brooks, a book I have found highly valuable for almost seven years now. I first came across this book in an airport. I was traveling to New York from Seattle, so I knew I would need something to read. At the time, working as a full-time facilitator for Insights, I was fascinated by books that addressed leadership, engagement and achievement. The Social Animal covered those three topics as well as love, character and student learning. It proved to be the perfect read for me.
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Magic of Yourself2/26/2018 “My teenage son, Scott, recently told me about a conversation that he had with his best friend. They concluded that they were happiest when they were five years old. When I asked Scott why they felt that way, he said: “Dad, when we were five, we were not self-conscious. We were freely ourselves in every moment, and we did not care what other people thought about us. Now we are constantly trying to measure up, to be somebody. We worry about what we look like, how we are dressed, and how we fit in with the other kids at school. It’s hard. At age five, none of this mattered. I miss being five years old.”
This isn’t my story. This is a paragraph out of the book Mastering Leadership, by Robert J. Anderson and William A. Adams. It’s a good book, in case you’re looking for an insightful read about leadership. I read this paragraph and immediately grabbed my computer to write this blog entry. I work with students to help them identify the pathway for their future. I work with professionals to help them navigate their professional world. What both groups have in common is that they almost always tell me they are trying to live up to the expectations of others.
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Shoes2/23/2018 How often do you look at someone’s shoes?
I’m not a huge shoe person. If you ask my husband, I own a lot of them. Although, I know that I don’t have nearly as many as some of my friends. Many of them are hands- down-shoe-people. They have closets bursting with shoes — some of the best-looking shoes that I have ever seen. They’re the first to tell me that shoes complete your outfit. Some will even choose cute over comfort. My shoe style? Practical, but still cute. When I was younger, I always thought that having a size 8 shoe size would be great. It seemed that every cute shoe came in a size 8. Maybe that is why I never developed a shoe obsession. They never seemed to fit my size 10 feet. I was already a size 10 in middle school — no cute shoes were a size 10 when I was in middle school.
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Employee First.2/22/2018 Her infant son is sick and will spend months in and out of the ER. She knows she needs to stay focused on what is most important – her baby. Her manager tells her to do what she needs to do for her family. They work out an adjusted schedule that allows for her to stay focused on her baby – every ounce of attention that is needed for her son is permitted. And, they have an agreement to keep her engaged with her projects at work. Two years later, her baby is a healthy toddler and she is recognized as the “top performer” for the company.
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Elevator ride.2/21/2018 It was a Monday morning, October 1, 2012.
I was headed to facilitate a training for a team at Microsoft. I was proud of myself for arriving on time, early in fact. Happy to have a warm latte in my hand, I also managed to carry my purse, computer bag and roll a cart of training materials behind me. It was sunny outside and honestly it was a good Monday. I pushed the elevator button to go up and waited for the elevator to arrive. When the doors opened, four men came out of the elevator laughing, almost like grade-school boys. I didn’t think much of it and thought maybe they were having a good day too. I proceeded to make my way into the elevator and push the button 23, when I realized immediately why those men were laughing. They had pushed every single button in the elevator as they got out. Childlike I thought. In a moment, something so tiny took my great Monday and really made it go sour. I was so annoyed by having to stop at all these floors. Also, I happen to hate being in elevators, so this was just extending an already unenjoyable experience. And as the seconds passed, I was no longer just annoyed. I was furious.
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Coaching for the Coach2/20/2018 I was recently offered a pretty cool job with a very big company. I declined.
My colleague, Michael, and I met last Thursday over coffee, just to catch up. He is a huge part of my inspiration to leave my last full-time role and start my own consulting practice. I’ve known Michael now for, I believe, 8 years. He has wanted me to join his team throughout the years and for one reason or another, it didn’t work out. Yet, we have maintained our connection. I met Michael while I worked for Insights. I was the facilitator for an Insights session he attended at Microsoft. When he left Microsoft to join Verathon, he asked me to facilitate an Insights session for his new team. I agreed. When I left Insights, he asked me to interview for a senior level role with Verathon. I declined and said I wasn’t ready for the role. Instead, I would say yes to Whole Foods Market.
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Eight years ago, Jason arrived home to tell his wife, Jessica, that he had been promoted to Group Manager. He didn’t really want the manager role, but was talked into it. Because he was the top performer — exceeding his quota by an average of 165% the last two quarters — it was assumed he’d be a great manager as well.
Jessica had been a manager for several months already and recalled the “Manager Immersion Boot Camp” that she recently went through at her Fortune 500 company. One of her colleagues had commented, “Any training with “immersion” and “boot camp” in it means the participants will probably be inspired during the training — but once back at their desk forget everything they learned. Too much information, with not enough application, is usually the problem.” What proved to be true was that Jessica couldn’t remember the tips she’d learned as Jason prepared to be “the manager” the following day in the office. She did however, give him the business card of her professional coach.
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You're enough today.2/14/2018 Sarah sits at her kitchen table and drops her head into her hands. She wonders how she is going to balance everything that is on her plate today – three business meetings and a proposal deadline, and now a sick child. Matt, Sarah’s husband, is facing an equally busy day at his office, and the decision was made the previous evening that Sarah would be the one to stay home with their daughter.
With full-time work schedules and the demands of two children, Sarah and Matt often feel like their lives are a juggling act. In their strong, supportive community, carpooling and help is easy to come by — a huge factor in making it all work out okay. Until something like a sick day throws a wrench into their system.
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Why student coaching?2/13/2018 I believe that high school and college are some of the best years of our lives – and some of the toughest years. The pressure students now face trying to identify what to do post school is tremendous. Competition to be accepted to college is at an all-time high. And it doesn’t end there. College graduates are starting their careers at a time of extremely high competition for roles. Students have so much data coming at them with regards to what they should do, can do and are supposed to do, it would even overwhelm me as an adult.
This process can be stressful for parents, too. They may struggle with knowing when to step back and when to intervene. Unintentionally, some parents can get tunnel vision. They want the best for their child but are unable to see beyond their own version of a successful future. I hear from students that they appreciate the opportunity to talk with an adult outside of their immediate network. They like the fresh perspective and advice from a virtual stranger – after they meet me and realize I am much hipper than what they envisioned when they first heard the term “life coach”. |